Wednesday, 31 July 2013
INT: Grandad’s house.
Dad: So, Jimmy. Looking forward to seeing your grandfather?
Jimmy: Yes, dad. I hope he is better.
Dad: Doctors say that he’s clean now, son. Two years without a drop.
Mum: Amazing to think he’s changed so much. You’d hardly recognise him.
Dad: Yeah, I think everything’s going to be fine. Jimmy:
Yeah! Grandad is great!
Grandad opens the door. His silver hair is neatly combed and his eyes glimmer with lively sobriety. He welcomes them in.
Grandad: Hello! Lovely to see you. Jimmy! My grandson.
Jimmy: Hello grandad. You look great!
Grandad: Thanks, grandad is all better. Do you all want a nice cup of tea? I have some orange juice for Jimmy.
Dad: Sounds good dad, place looks brilliant. You’ve taken good care of it.
Grandad: Yep. Keeping active, doing all kinds of stuff about the house. Let me just go to the kitchen and get the tea.
Grandad disappears from the room.
Dad: Brilliant. He’s really done well. Hasn’t he, Jimmy?
Jimmy: Yes dad. Suddenly, a smashing sound is heard, and the sound of screaming.
Grandad enters the room, swigging from a bottle, eyes red raw, hair caked and matted against a shimmering, sweating head. He is partially retching.
Grandad: FUCK! fuckinellldooyoocuntsget in…HIC…help her fuckin…fuc…self to my fucinstuff wontyer..
Dad: Dad! What happened to you? You were only in there two minutes!
Grandad: Been FUCKING WELL HAVING SOME GOOD TIMES inni EH? Fore I have to look at your stupid faces…what’s that thing?
Jimmy: I’m your grandson Grandad.
Grandad: SMALL face on that cunt, like yours but smaller. *Points at Jimmy* Getcher small face sorted out, ‘therwise you’re never going to grow up, small face.
Jimmy: I’m a kid, Grandad.
Grandad: TIT OFF SHITBALLS, WEEEEEEEEHE! OOS THIS PIECE OF ASS?
Dad: It’s your daughter in law. My wife.
Grandad: BIT OF FUCKING ALRIIGHT. SHIT THIS TWO CUNTS OFF SWEETHEA…..HIC..ART…I’ll show you some old dog’s fuckin’ tricks..